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  • Writer's pictureSarahHauer

P for Physical Attraction

When people think of physical attraction, they almost always automatically think of the model in the latest fashion trend all trim to the point of anorexia (I am not making a joke of that at all, nothing funny about it), to turn the heads of the opposite sex.

In this follow-up post about PIES, that is not what is meant by physical attraction. It is not about trying to look like some unattainable perfection that society has ordained as the ideal. Not at all. It is about looking and feeling the best possible to feel more attractive to yourself. There is nothing more attractive than a human of any gender walking into a room knowing they are at their best for their given conditions regardless of age, size, weight, or health status. It's about feeling your best for you, NOT compared to anyone else, especially not that actor on Netflix or that action star in that one movie.

Could Physical Attraction lead to others feeling attractive towards you? Maybe. That would be especially good if that other person is your spouse. But that's not what this is about. PIES is about appreciating yourself where you are at while setting measurable goals to get to being the best you possible regardless of age or station in life. It's about you, for you.

In the previous PIES blog, I talked about how I set measurable goals for my physical well-being. I set an amount for weight loss, clothing size, and a measurement for endurance by walking so far in a given amount of time. When I set these goals, I did NOT have anyone else in mind but me. Just me. Only me. Have I said that enough? This was all about me in only one month. Therefore, I also set the goals to be realistic with the understanding that if I did not accomplish those goals at the end of the month, I would NOT beat myself up for it. I chose to focus more on my intentions and activities than on results. I started slow and did not accomplish my goals that first month. Then a domino effect happened. Today, I am mostly working on solidifying where I am at with those, and am working on others such as allowing myself pedicures that I always felt were an unnecessary expense, new clothes more regularly, keeping up with my hair style, etc.

I found I was feeling great about my physical beauty when I was still twenty pounds overweight. It wasn't about the weight. It wasn't about the clothing size. It was about how I was treating myself. Was I giving myself physical self-love? The answer was no except when it came to pain management. Pain management was important, but it wasn't enough. I had to look beyond that. Looking beyond my pain levels and ability to move in general helped with that domino effect. Motion is lotion no matter who you are, especially if you have a physical issue. Right after my back surgery, being able to walk down the hall of the hospital made me feel amazing! If I was PIES journaling back then, that would have been a big gratitude.

Reaching my weight and endurance goals wasn't enough as the months went on. I am not looking to be a stick. I am not looking to be a weight lifter. I can't anyhow. I have to be realistic on my physical self-love, hence the other things such as hair and nails.

However, P in PIES has other factors as well for mental health benefits such as while out walking, enjoying the scenery. Better yet, exchanging that walk for a camping trip or a shopping day. Taking the time to do myself up a bit on a day when I have plans to go nowhere and see no one. I am reason enough to look nice.

It's less about how I look versus how I see myself. Then, how others see me matters less. Interesting, the less I care about how others see me, the more others respond to me positively. Amazing how that happens.

At night, I journal what I did that day to make myself feel better about my physical self. Each thing does not have to be so big. It can be small things. One of the best PIES lessons for me has been how small steps forward add up over time. Patience is the key.

What does this have to do about a blog about writing my novels? Everything. Writing takes time. It takes small steps forward. Sometimes steps forward mean dismantling a chapter and starting it all over again. That feels like steps backwards, but it isn't. It's progress.

PIES is like that too. For P, it can mean looking at the cupboards and throwing out the bad to replace with the good. (That wasn't a fun day.) On the flip side, sometimes, a P for a day is the ability to have that piece of chocolate cake calling your name that got into the gratitude journal.

What are you doing today to physically give yourself a hug and love on yourself?

Thanks for reading!


Humor In Chaos


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