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  • Writer's pictureSarahHauer

How Do You Eat Chocolate?


I was hungry. No. Let me rephrase that. I was craving me some chocolate. Big time. I was at the grocery store and saw it there in the check out aisle. It was staring at me in an almost diabolical way saying, "Go ahead, woman. Take a bite out of me." So, I bought it.


I took it home. I set it on the kitchen island while I put away the groceries. It was staring at me. My daughter who was sitting at the same kitchen island was watching me watch it.


"Really?" she asked.


"Yes," was all I replied.


Groceries put away, it was time for my reward. I carefully opened the package and took a bite out of the square. It being a square was the problem. See - I didn't break me off a piece of that Kit Kat bar. I simply took a bite out of the intact square.


"What?!" came the exasperated tone from the other side of the island. "That's how you eat those? You can't eat it that way."


"I just did."


"That's how sociopaths eat those," she exaggerated. "Did you know that?" No, because that is an exaggeration. "There are videos and TikToks about how that is not the proper way to eat those candy bars. You are crazy."


"I am not crazy. I just didn't want to get chocolate on my fingers." I finished my candy bar with us both laughing, and then we got on with our day. Side note: I had offered her some before I took that bite. She declined.


She got me thinking. Is there really a right way to eat chocolate? Apparently there is. There are a myriad of videos, articles, and blogs about how to best savor chocolate. After looking at a few, I found this one by Ghirardelli is on target. https://www.ghirardelli.com/how-to-taste-chocolate But you can decide that for yourself. Everyone's experience with chocolate is personal.


I do like how this one goes through all five senses, taking the time to experience them all, and the idea of taking the time to experience the chocolate, not just eat the chocolate. Some compare it to enjoying a fine wine. I was thinking a slow, pleasurable, sexual experience. But I won't go there because this did originate with a conversation with my daughter, and that's just weird.


Most of the best experiences of my life were celebrated with chocolate. For me, it's a celebration staple.


But chocolate should be savored not devoured. I devoured that candy bar. I regret that I didn't eat something from the grocery pile first to waylay my hunger before eating it. I wish I had taken more time to enjoy the palatable experience.


I am a long-standing chocoholic. My entire life. I don't have a preference between dark or milk chocolate. It depends on the setting and the mood I am in.


As a kid, my friends used to give me gifts that either were chocolate or centered around chocolate. One of my favorite Christmas presents was one of those giant Hershey's Kisses. Hard to go wrong there with a chocoholic kid like me.


There is a reason why high end hotels leave a chocolate on the pillow when they do turn down service. They want guests to feel a state of bliss and associate that with their establishment.


There is a reason chocolate is a mainstay of Valentine's Day. I will refer back to my comparison of a pleasurable sexual experience and leave it there.


No good meal is complete without a little something sweet. I prefer it be chocolate most of the time. Not all. Sometimes a lava cake fits the bill. Sometimes just a tiny bite of a chocolate mint. Sometimes I want something without chocolate.


A chocolate martini during the holiday season? Yeah, baby! But not any other time of the year.


The best chocolate is a shared chocolate. S'mores are my favorite. Around the campfire. Especially with a child who is enjoying their very first one. The gooiness of the perfectly toasted marshmallow and the crunch of the graham cracker set the stage for the slowly melted chocolate as it drips down the chin. Couple that with the smell of the burning coals awaiting the next marshmallow to roast, and you've got yourself a winner of an evening out. I can't eat a s'more with happy memories melting into my mind.


Mmmm...chocolate. Good thing I have some chocolate chips in my fridge.


What's your favorite way to eat chocolate? Shoot me an email at humorinchaos@gmail.com


Thanks for reading!


Sarah

 

Follow me on YouTube, Instagram, Facebook, and Twitter @HumorInChaos


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