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  • Writer's pictureSarahHauer

Breakthrough Trees

Humor In Chaos

Searching for Joy


Breakthrough Trees



One of Jesus’s often used symbols in His parables is the seed. The seed sown in different types of soil, faith the size of a mustard seed, the mystery of how a seed grows into a plant, etc.


Interesting thing about seeds – they don’t get to choose where they are sown. They get tossed about, hopefully buried in fertile ground. Something or someone else plants them there. Tossed into a field deliberately by a farmer or dropped somewhere by the wind.


Sometimes, they find themselves in a place with built-in fertilizer after having been eaten by an animal, passed through a digestive system, and then randomly dumped along with other excrement.


That’s how certain aspects of my life have felt. Like I got chewed up, digested, and dumped in a heaping pile of shit. Here’s the thing: At least I got dumped with the necessary nutrients to grow into something.


It’s awe-inspiring to see a plant grow to full potential in sub-optimal conditions. I was thinking on this at 4am staring out my apartment window north of Los Angeles on a dark autumn morning looking at the lights across the parking lot. My mind traveled to the trees of the meadow in front of my house in out-state Minnesota where I used to live. This is not where I want to be. I want to be looking at that meadow, sitting on my front porch, hot cup of tea in hand, watching for deer cross the lawn. I miss that life. Like it or not, this is where I am. It is up to me to grow here or not. Today.


That’s how it is for all of us, isn’t it? That’s the difference between the tree outside my apartment window that didn’t ask to get planted in the middle of an asphalt parking lot in between hard, concrete structures versus the maple tree that was planted in front of my dream home in the country in a vast, green lawn surrounded by fellow vegetation. Both trees deliberately planted by human hands. Both expected to flourish. One in need of care. Both created with the same potential in the seed. Both grew to size and shape based on how they surrendered and adapted to the conditions they were forced to enjoy or endure.


We marvel at the trees growing in nature. Few marvel at the trees growing in the middle of an asphalt desolation. I think we should be more inspired by the trees in the city surrounded by hard concrete. Especially the ones that break through that concrete to make room for themselves when conditions aren’t ideal to reach full potential. The breakthrough trees. The trees that take adversity, break it into pieces, and push it all aside to let their roots grow freely. The ones surrounded by busted up pavement.


I am not that tree. At least, not yet. Maybe I am becoming one as I am adapting to my dramatically changing conditions? I don’t know.


Right now, I know that I am that tree that was sown as a seed in fertile ground by a gardener where I sprouted in relative safety and comfort with others of my species, and then got transplanted into an urban development.


Shade. That should be my purpose in being here. To provide shade and color and oxygen. If I am that tree, am I fulfilling my purpose? Is my being here truly random? Or was I transplanted here by someone with a plan?


Hi. My name is Sarah. I am a Cradle Catholic, sinner, life coach, and novelist. I coach people who are where I was, working to discover their next steps after being planted where they are instead of where they wanted to be and trying to find a direction to grow roots.


I write stories about Christians trying to define who they are while living in the chaos of being God-fearing sinners in a broken world. That is what I write because that is what I am. I am broken.


Heads up as you continue reading. In this blog series, Searching for Joy, expect swear words, uncomfortable situations, hard lessons, Bible verse references, and hopefully the Love of God.


I am no Bible scholar or theologian. I am no angel, saint, or nun. I am not a preacher. This is a series of personal essays, written by a Bible reading, devout Catholic, that is not sanctioned by the Catholic Church or any persons affiliated with it. I am a real sinner in the truest sense of the word who also loves God with a desire for deeper intimacy with Him.


Jesus didn’t come for the perfect people. He came for the sinners like me. People who are doing their best to find joy on the other side of traumas – the breakthrough tree people. People who need joy before they get to that other side, or they won’t get there. Because joy isn’t only found over there. Joy is found in the here and now, too. We need it.


This series is how I found the Joy of Christ amid my real human struggles, how I broke through the concrete around me, and continue to struggle to grow joyfully. I invite you to get a glimpse into my life.


No, you don’t have to be Christian to find Joy. Joy is for everyone, all beliefs, faiths, and traditions. I welcome you and want you to experience it too. I want you to be a breakthrough person too.


Thanks for reading!



Humor In Chaos



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